Episode #1: Inconvenient Refugees part 1: Illa and Ziri

Mar,14 2025

Every month, every single month, the Free Zone Directorate of Costa Rica forces me to get dressed as they ring the intercom to speak with me. And not over the intercom.

"We need to invoice you a surcharge due to overconsumption of water", or "we have a penalty because you didn't consume the minimum electricity requirements."

It's always small amounts, it's what it called death by bureaucratic paper cuts. I think that the real reason for the visits, is only to remind us that we made a pact to follow more rules than other free zones around the world.

At least, when the local naturist free zones formed a council, they stopped ringing at the other ones, and I get all the visits at mine. Fun.

At first, Pedro would come, alone, and he didn't mind that neither Amanda nor me would be dressed, but Pedro, speaks too fast and only in Spanish. I can handle Spanish, but slowly. I could hardly follow his speech.

Alvaro replaced Pedro. He can speak perfect English, or almost, he does have an accent, but cannot tolerate any nudity.

What Alvaro also lacks, is the ability to negotiate. Like, if they decide to raise our a minimum quota of electricity by 100 MW/h to raise their revenues, he will not accept to wait a month for us to receive new equipment to use that electricity. We will pay a penalty right away. Pedro, would perhaps raise by 50 this month, and 50 the next month so the penalty isn't so steep.

I get to the business exchange room. Like the old DMZ in between North Korea and South Korea, half of the room is in Costa Rica and the other half is in our free zone.

Every free zone on the planet now has such a room, since that way, we cannot detain someone from the Costa Rica side of the room, and Costa Rica cannot arrest or detain us on our side of the room.

There have been free zones, especially the big conglomerates in Nicaragua, where the residents are often kept against their will for life, and make no mistake, if someone is caught on our property, we are not required to free them unless we want to.

Amanda is our attorney. She oversees all relations with Costa Rica, whether I want it or not. The reality, is that from our side, she is required, and I am fully optional. For Costa Rica, they would prefer if she didn't show up, but they need me there. What a delicious irony.

We sit, each with our tablet. Alvaro is alone, this isn't a good sign. He is usually with an accountant, or a delegate of a ministry of some sort. This, is a shakedown.

"Alvaro, what can I do for you?"

"Do you follow the Costa Rica news?"

I look at Amanda, who nods.

"Can you refresh my memory?"

"Remember the Earthquake in Algeria?"

"I do, massive flooding, multiple refugee ships refused, well, everywhere"

"Two of them just crash-landed on the East coast of Costa Rica"

"So what, are you asking for money to repair their ship so they can do elsewhere?"

"No. The ships have sunk. It's the end of the road. As per United Nation rules, we need to take them, as it wasn't a voluntary sinking"

"Oh, you need money to relocate them?"

"No, we need you to take at least 10 of them in. Each"

"Each free zone? No way. We are naturists, you know that? Algeria is Muslim. They usually frown upon those things"

"Check your charter. You are required to help in a humanitarian crisis"

"And we give you food, but nothing else"

"We will bring here the first 3 families. We will only send those with at least one English speaker. You brief them. But I will have a member of our immigration ministry. If they accept, you take them in. I can go see the others, or you can screen all of them. If you screen all of them, one can take 8 and another 12. If individually, you need to take 10, and can't split families."

"None of them will accept"

"All of them are desperate"

"Alvaro, don't do this"

"It's out of my hands, my friend. They are on their way. So, do I visit the others?"

"No, the council will handle them. What if none of them accept?"

"Then we go back to the first families and ask them again, unless another free zone accepted them."

And on that, he left.

"Ideas?", I ask Amanda.

"I warned you when I got on board that they could do this."

"I know, but they also know that nudity is mandatory, so is the skin cancer vaccine"

"We have enough doses in stock"

"Amanda, you know that this isn't the problem"

"And if they accept, they will know what they are accepting. He said it, at least one English- speaking member of the family"

"Get Fatima anyway", I ask her.

Fatima is of Berber origin, but born in the USA, 3rd generation immigrant. She still speaks Arabic and became a naturist by choice. Even before free zones were a thing.

I decide to wait at the table, in case the first families arrive earlier than planned. Why shift this to us? I mean, I have the answer.

Any country that accepts a climate refugee ship gets a focus from all the other refugee ships. How can they roam the globe? Easy, many countries will refuel them, feed them and take care of them, including Panama, but only so they are seen as humanitarian.

Costa Rica got a hot potato on their hands, and the whole world is looking at them.

The worst is, Costa Rica is one of the rare countries with still wide open immigration policies, but climate refugees and immigrants aren't the same thing.

You select which immigrants you want, you get stuck with the boat people, and then, more boats arrive. I get that.

Fatima arrived quickly, nude.

"Fatima, I need you to get dressed to help me brief the families"

"I am a naturist, I don't put clothes on, ever."

I sigh. "Then, can you wait in the anti-chamber, I'll conference you in?"

"Sure. Can I open the monitor for the camera, to see them?"

"You can"

"Thank you, administrator"

"Call me Dave"

"You know I can't do that", she says, leaving the business conference room.

I turn to Amanda.

"Amanda, I thought earthquakes had nothing to do with climate change?"

"They have nothing to do with climate change"

"So why are they climate refugees?"

"Because Algeria is drying up, so when their they got it, they couldn't relocate anywhere else."

"So it's not that the earthquake forced them on a boat, it's that after they got it, they couldn't get anywhere else?"

"From my understanding"

Instead of sending them as a group, the immigration official, a woman named Maria who barely spoke English, just enough for pleasantries, took them up family by family.

The first one, just a woman and her 5-year-old son, just ran away when we mentioned we were naturists. The next one debated between the wife and the husband for about 5 minutes, but they decided to decline.

Amanda proposed to go over the advantages of living in our free zone before revealing that we were naturists.

The next family came up. They looked even more battered than the first two. A couple with a 9-year-old boy and a 7-year-old girl. Both looked rather thin.

"Who speaks English between you?", I asked.

The woman replied. "All four of us, I taught them"

"Good. So, do you know what a free zone is?"

"I do. There was one, an hour drive from our farm. My husband would farm, and I would trade with them our food"

"So why did you leave?"

"We lost our irrigation in the earthquake."

"The free zone wouldn't help you?"

"No. They wouldn't even let us talk to them"

"I see. We do a lot of farming, you could help us with that. No one is hungry here. You would get a home, your kids would go to school, in English, but a good school"

"Oh, thank you so much."

"But you know you couldn't leave, right?"

"We know that. But the world is closed to us. We were bullied on the ship by the crew because we sold to the Free Zone."

"Amanda, can you go fetch some bread to help them?"

"Sure, Administrator"

She normally calls me Dave, but not in front of applicants

"Oh, thank you, sir.", says the woman.

"So, your husband is Ziri, and you are Illi?"

"Yes, Ziri means moonshine, and IIli means my daughter. My parents had 4 sons before me and were happy to get me"

"Where is your family now?"

"In a Sicilian refugee camp."

I winced. Europe closed their borders, and Italy still received too many refugees who lost their boat on the simple crossing of the Mediterranean Sea. To house them, a miserable refugee camp was built on the island of Sicily, where over a million people are housed in inhuman conditions. But recently, Italy has been turning away boats before they reach their shores, so they can't even sink on the beach to get in.

"My sympathies"

"Thank you"

"And your daughter is Sakina, while your son is Meddur?"

"Yes, meaning, Calm, and strong"

"I like that. You picked nice names for your kids.", they both smile.

"I try to be strong", says the son, with a big accent.

"They worked a lot on our field to help us. No schools nearby so I tried to teach them"

"Maybe you could help teach our kids."

"I would like that", said Illi.

Amanda came back with more than just bread. She brought some fruits, croissants, pastries. It was all home cooked or picked.

"Eat, while I need to tell you about our free zone"

"Thank you, may peace be unto you", said Illi. They were all nervous, but after the kids picked, the parents did, with the father going last.

"Eat as much as you need. If you join us, we'll find you a home, and give you a few days to get back on your feet before sending your kids to school, and asking your husband to help us in the fields"

"Thank you"

"Ok, so we are a cooperative. That means that we all work for each other. I am the administrator, so I make the important decisions for our boss, but we all decide together on the future of the zone. Including you if you join us"

They have their mouth full, so I just keep going. The kids seem so happy to eat.

"We don't use money in the free zone, but everyone expected to contribute. It's often like that in a free zone."

Illi replies. "I heard that"

"Our income comes from a small, manned factory which produces specialized violins, viola, cello and even double bass. It's our main export, and musicians around the world pay top dollar for them."

"Interesting", says Illi.

I nod.

"We also work on the Internet, run a bank, we run a world-class hospital. We offer services which are sough by the outside world. We are going good for ourselves, are stable, and safe. Enough food for everyone, and no crime"

"We would be so grateful to be accepted"

"We are in a partnership with other Free Zone around. We organize events, and share resources. We have a big elementary school, but the high school is in the next Free Zone and they have a good University. With our system, we can travel to some from our Free Zone to some of the others, with permission"

"Interesting, the one next to the farm stood alone", says Illi.

"We are all mostly cooperatives, but you can't move from one to another, just visit"

Illi and her husband nod.

"You would be safe, you would work, but decent hours, with a lot of time with your family. We have Fatima, listening in, who is also a Berber. We would welcome at least 6 other people from your boat in this Free Zone, and 10 in each of the others. I think we have a few other Muslim families around if you want to keep your faith, but most of us are atheist. It's the times, you know?"

"I know. Our faith was also shaken", says Illi.

"There are just two conditions to join our Free Zone"

"I am listening", she says.

"First, we need to give you the skin cancer vaccine"

"Sure. We heard about it", she says.

"Second, all of our connected Free Zone are naturist. That means, nudist. All of us, are nude, naked"

She looks at me with wide eyes.

"Pardon me?"

"We all live without ever wearing clothing"

"Why?"

"Because we like that? We find it freeing?"

"How freeing can it be if you force the residents?"

"Now, that, is a good question. Normally, people apply to come here. They agree to donate their money to buy a citizenship. You would get in free, but you aren't naturists. It's a lot to ask"

She turns to her husband, and they talk a little in Arabic.

It gets a little heated, with the kids joining.

"Perhaps I can leave you alone to think it over?", I propose.

"Please, it's a big request"

"I know"

Amanda and I leave and join Fatima.

"So, what are they saying?"

"I short, she thinks it's worth it for them to join us to give a future to their children. He thinks it's insane. The kids are tired of being on a boat."

"It seems heated"

"He says it's improper. That maybe other free zones will accept them"

"Hey, it's not like we really opened immigration up", says Amanda

"No, but they are struggling", says Fatima.

The tone raised in the other room.

"Oh, she just said that she isn't leaving. That he agrees, or she joins with just the kids and her"

"Ok, let me go back in"

"No, wait, he is telling her that he loves her"

Illa speaks for a while. The husband says something, and silence falls.

"What was that?"

"She pleaded that they promised each other to do whatever they needed to do to protect their kids. To give them a chance, and this is it. That he had said that for her, he would cross the desert on his knee when they got married, so he should do this, it's easier"

"Wow"

"And now, he just agreed"

"Let's go close the deal!"