Episode #7: Overcoming Trauma #7: The Resort

Jan,12 2026

<-#6: Overcoming Trauma #6: Golf widows

"Let's carpool. I can drive, and your husband can bring you and your kids back", she said.

It seemed sensible; it seemed logical. The three kids fit well in the back seat of her car, with Kyle in the middle, all excited about going for a swim.

Sunblock has been put on everyone before getting in the car, but I only put it on my exposed areas, if only as a way to make sure I wasn't joining in too much in the fun.

It was a good idea for her to drive since I had no idea where we were going, and I wasn't sure I could actually get there due to my nerves.

And yet.

And yet I ended up in the passenger's seat, with no exit, no control over the movement of the car, and no decisions to be made over the destination.

I felt like I was a kid again, pushed into my mother's car to go to a protest I didn't agree with. Or often, had no idea what it was about.

This time, it was me bringing my kids to a place I didn't agree with. Not that I disagreed; just, on my own accord, I wouldn't have set foot in there.

I guess this is where the comparison to my mother's protest ends. Because I was usually horrified by her causes, and this naturist resort we were heading to only felt like an extension of the little experiment occurring in my house all week.

Not that I took part in it, but I was, well, subjected to it. And now, my previously non-participating husband was joining in the fun, leaving me as the only sole remaining textile in the family.

That's a new word I heard. It means anyone who isn't a naturist. It doesn't mean people who wear clothes, since naturists do wear clothes. In fact, even Nadia is wearing clothes to drive.

Textile means not willing to undress socially, and that I wasn't ready for.

Ready for. That's an odd thought, as it left the door open to being ready...

We reached the gate in a God-forsaken section of town. Well, assuming we are still in the town and not in some unincorporated section of the county.

I don't know what I expected. That it would be like any golf club, and you can see people in the courtyard from the street?

Instead, I saw an ugly green corrugated metal fence blocking the view from the road. It made sense, even if it's, well, ugly.

There was a parking lot outside the fence, and while I saw cars, I didn't see my husband's car.

Instead, we made it to a keypad/intercom sticking from the ground where Nadia pressed her phone, which produced a beep.

In front of us, a sort of door opened in the fence, and she was able to drive inside and park next to her husband's pickup, which is next to my husband's car.

We get out of the car. Currently, the parking lot is hidden by hedgerows and a sort of welcome building.

Nadia grabs the towels she stowed in the trunk and puts them on top of the car. She then just removed her dress and put it in the trunk, and soon enough, the clothes of the kids.

Even if I want to take off with them in my husband's car, I would need access to her trunk.

We went into the lobby, where a nude woman that can't be more than 23 welcomes Nadia and Cassie by name.

I have to pay some money, but I use my credit card and don't really focus on it. This is an experiment, and I notice that Nadia doesn't have to pay. Perhaps she is a member or something?

Nadia does leave her car keys to the woman.

We soon make it into the main courtyard, on the other side. Quickly, I realize that I stick out like a sore thumb, being the only person stupid enough to be wearing clothes when the sun is burning down on us.

I don't care.

I want to find my husband; the kids would like to swim, so the compromise is that Nadia will go in the pool with the little ones while I find the golf course.

After all, I can't go into the pool myself.

Somehow, walking to the golf course is worse. Before, I was walking and talking to a naturist woman, and now, I was a lone, dressed woman in a place where clothing seemed taboo.

There were people my age, but also my parents's age, and everything in between.

I even noticed one of the doctors from the hospital who, fortunately, was speaking with a woman his age, perhaps his wife, and a teenager, probably their daughter. He didn't notice me. Dr. Philips is a surgeon who we often consult in trauma, so I am rather close to him at work, and I don't want to see him nude.

I saw my husband before I noticed the golf course. I suspect it's because I love him, and I am completely indifferent to the sport he loves so much.

He did get me to play a few times. I am not good at it, but mostly, I still remain indifferent.

To him, I am not. He has no idea I will be here, so when he notices me, he waves his hand at me, excited.

Suddenly, I finally feel comfortable here. The love of my life is looking at me and is keeping me safe. All is well.

I walk toward him. He has his baseball cap on and is holding his putter. I notice his golf shoes, with his socks not even rolled down.

Honestly, after a few hours with Nadia, he is a nice sight for sore eyes.

When I reach him, he tells me we can't actually kiss each other, which I find sad, but I can accept there are rules I don't understand.

"This is the last hole. Patrick was kicking my ass because he knows this course like the back of his hand, but I am catching up"

"Well, maybe next time. Assuming you want a next time", I tell him.

"Yeah, perhaps I do. We actually played with a couple, but they left after seven holes"

"Did you have fun?"

"A ton, and it helped me reframe plenty of things"

"Good. I had Nadia drop in early this morning, and she offered to come meet you guys"

"And the kids?"

"They should be in the pool right now"

"Oh, I could go for a swim. It's so hot today!"

"It is."

"Oh, it's my turn. Give me a minute"

He goes and putts his ball straight into the hole.

After laughing a little with Patrick, John joins me back.

"If he misses this, I will be only 1 stroke behind him"

But he doesn't.

The two grab their balls and their bags. "Will you accompany me to the car as I go drop this?" he says.

"Sure"

Patrick comes over. "Hey Elena. Happy to see you. Did you have fun with Nadia?"

Of course he knew. "I think so."

"We're eating in the restaurant soon; perhaps you can join us with your kids?"

I agree, and I walk beside my husband back to his car. What else can I do? Force the kids to leave so early after arriving?

As John narrates back his game, I wonder. Was Nadia arriving here all premeditated? If Patrick already knew about Nadia's plans, it means they discussed it before Nadia arrived, and I was a fool for thinking it was spontaneous.

Oh well, the kids were excited to come, and I can be with my husband.

"Did it help you, really?" I ask him.

"I think so. I mean, it's no magic bullet, but it helped undo some bad associations, you know?"

"I do."

He had the keys in his bag, but after putting it in the trunk and changing his golf shoes for sandals, he dropped the keys at the lobby.

"You have your wallet, right?"

I show him my purse as an answer.

We went to the pool, where I saw my kids playing not only with Cassie but with other kids. Nadia and other parents were in there, either throwing things to pick up or playing with a beach ball like it was a volleyball game or something, with the kids.

After removing my sandals, I sat on the edge of the pool and dropped my feet into the water. The temperature was just perfect.

John, meanwhile, found an outdoor shower to rinse at, and soon enough, he was in the water.

I stood my ground, but Nadia came to talk to me. At some point, she even left the water and sat next to me, but just far enough not to drip water over my sundress.

We talked a little, but to her credit, she put zero pressure on me to remove my dress. She mainly mentioned how my son was fun in the water.

"It's like he has boundless energy"

"Maybe for moving, but after school, he needs to rest before doing his homework"

"I get that. Homework is depressing. I used to fight with Cassie when she was his age to just sit down and do it"

"It was easy with Sarah"

"Well, she is just perfect, isn't she? Intelligent and smart, which are not the same thing. But she is also kind and empathetic. She is an excellent influence on Cassie. You did an impressive job with her"

I smile. Sometimes, I get the impression that Sarah almost raised herself. Maybe it's my need to be self-reliant when I was growing up that got inherited? Surely not. I did foster independence, which worked wonderfully with her, but still had limited results with Kyle.

"Do you know all these kids?"

"Pretty much. Some come to our house sometimes, but none are as close friends as Sarah is to Cassie."

"Are you friends with their parents?"

She sighs.

"It's complicated. Want to go for a walk to be out of earshot?"

I look, and there are more than enough parents playing with the kids.

So I get up, and she does too, not even bothering to dry up.

"Some have a house here"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, that way... We could have. We considered it. But the problem is that most naturists, well, have nothing else to talk about"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, your family and mine, we live rich lives. We play board games and video games, and we go out to eat, and not just here. We do get all dressed up and go eat at fancy places. For us, naturism is a lifestyle, but not our whole lives"

"I like that"

She smiles.

"But like, Frank and Kara. They live here with their kids. Kara homeschools them; he worked in finance from home. They have their groceries delivered, so they can spend weeks or months without wearing clothes. They never go out; they never do anything. We tried to be friends, but what is there to talk about? They don't even watch TV!"

"They are rather limited in experiences", I say.

"We don't want that. Cassie isn't homeschooled; she never was. She needs to get dressed every morning for school, and we try to go out every weekend in textile space."

"But not my home", I jab at her.

She laughs. "No. Indeed. But Cassie wanted to try laser tag. Maybe we could go, both families. And yes, everyone will be wearing clothes; it's in town"

I went a few times when I was in university. I don't like it much, but we would all be dressed up...

"Could be interesting. Not that I am good at it"

She smiles.

"I think I see some houses", I say as we venture that way.

We walk down the street, and she points at one.

"This is the one we considered buying", she says, pointing at one.

"Your current one is much nicer"

"True. And in the long term, a better investment. We bought the land, but here, you need to rent it."

"I see."

We mostly look at the houses as we walk. An elderly couple is gardening in front of theirs. I see kids's bikes at some of them.

I wonder how extreme their lives could be, especially those who are homeschooled.

We soon return to the pool, and I realize that the walk has been quite pleasant. I saw a dimension to Nadia that I hadn't noticed before.

It's time to go eat, so the kids get out and dry up. Nadia air-dried meanwhile.

My husband walks by my side as our two families get to the resort restaurant.

<-#6: Overcoming Trauma #6: Golf widows